For the most part I am a fairly cheery fellow, and this is a good thing. I dont pretend to be permanently happy though, and in fact I can be in pretty dark places sometimes. Fortunately for me, the aim of my life is not to be permanently happy; indeed I would be a little worried if I was permanently happy.
The goal is to be joyful and content, neither of these things necessarily equate to happiness. Joy is about praising God for everything I have at this moment, even pain. Contentedness is about being completely satisfied with what I have at the moment, whether its plenty or very little. The key to both of these things is that I have the gospel in my heart, and that is all I need.
No matter what the situation, the gospel is sufficient. No matter how deep the pain, I can always rejoice in what Christ has done for me. I dont ever need to be happy, but I can always be joyful. I need to constantly remind myself of this, because whenever I stop being happy I totally forget!
Happiness is not the goal, and never will be. It would be better to spend the rest of my life in mourning, totally focused on Christ than it would be to spend my life happy but blind to him.